Hey guys. Sorry for skipping a day. I really must stop apologizing for this stuff. It's a simple thing that I've already explained. So anyway. On to the actual blog.
So today I went to this training thing to become a mentor to some teenagers. I'm hoping it'll help with some of my social awkwardness and total anxiety towards big groups of people. I'm hoping it'll also help with my depression. Who knows. But I doubt it, seeing as nothing has helped all that much with it. But anyway, the training day was fun. I got to hang out with some friends for a couple hours while we were training. We played games and "mingled" (a word I absolutely detest, by the way). I didn't meet all that many people there because of my social pariah status. I'm a wallflower and an introvert and it's just hard. I don't trust easily either, so that makes it even harder. I saw one of my absolute best friends there, let's call her Styx. I'm guessing that I really like names with an "X" in them because I have Jix, Styx, and another person I will introduce and talk about later is Oxi. Huh... Interesting... Anyway.
Styx is one of my best friends. I met her this year, but we have bonded (another gross and mushy word that I hate using, but whatever) so much and I would trust her with my life. She's absolutely hilarious and I don't think I could have made it this year without her. She's my dark angel, if anyone understands that.
Jix was also at this mentor thing. When I got to the place I was supposed to be trained, Styx and Jix were standing together. Styx had just gotten out of her car and i guess Jix had been there for a bit. When I got out of my car, I waved at Styx and Jix. Jix pointed at me in a joking way (if that even makes sense) until I reached him. Styx just smiled and waved at me. When I got close enough for them to hear me, I yelled out to Jix, "You don't need to point at me, you do realize that right?" He just laughed. Later on, we were still joking around. During the games and stuff we would tease each other and laugh at each other. Afterwards, he bumped into me and we started pushing each other with our shoulders, lightly so we didn't fall into anyone else, but with enough force to make us move.
"Geez Aspen. You're always in the way."
"I know that Jix. I did that on purpose. Cause then I'd be in your way."
"Haha. Is that so?"
"Yup."
It was fun. We had fun. I didn't even realize Jix was being trained with me, so it was a fun surprise. A pleasant surprise. It pleased me. It meant that I had another year to interact closely with him. It's cool knowing that I have time. Like normally, I assume that I have but the shortest time to interact with someone, but here, in this situation, I have a promise of extra time. It's a nice break. I can do what I want with the time I have been guaranteed.
Anyway... Away from Jix and the impending rant I could have about time and depression and being left behind that will most likely come later, I'm going to tell you about yesterday. OH! We also had donuts at this training thing. So yay. Good donuts, too.
So yesterday, I took my first exam. It was relatively easy. I was supposed to take two yesterday, but I got exempt from the other one for passing a different test saying that I had learned everything throughout the year and learned it efficiently. So that was good. It took some of the pressure off because the exam I did take was one of the hardest. The other hardest exam was the one I got exempt from. Which is a beautiful thing. So anyway, I think I did rather well on my exam. It was on paper, too. So that made my brain not freak out and feel the panic as much. I panic enough as it is when I feel extremely pressured about a big test. It gets worse when that big test is given electronically. So it was a big relief when I saw it was on paper. Huge weight off the chest.
I don't have much else. So I'm going to end it here with the normal quote as the sign off thing.
QUOTE:
SOMETIMES YOUR HEART NEEDS MORE TIME TO ACCEPT WHAT YOUR MIND ALREADY KNOWS.
Until next time,
A.K.
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